The last few months

I have not posted in the last few months, due to the emotional roller coaster our family has been going through. The end of March my mom called to tell me my Dad was ill and in the hospital, she told us not to come down that he would be fine. He was released and came home, but still did not feel well. The first week in April my mom called and asked me to come down to Florida that he was not doing well. I made arrangements for work and the boys, she calls me back and says you all need to come. We took the boys out of school and went to Florida. I was not at all prepared to see my Dad in the condition he was in, he had lost 50lbs since we had seen him the end of January. The boys walked by him and he asked me who's kids they were, this hit Max especially hard since he is very close to his grandfather.
The day we arrived we found out that we were dealing with cancer which started in the lungs and spread to his liver, my mom and I had him admitted to the local hospital for IV fluids. Our hope was that once he received the fluids his memory and strength would return. My mom, myself and Max went to visit him the next day (Brayden came down with strepp so he and Danny stayed at the house) he did not look any better. My mom told us to go back to Kentucky since there was nothing for us to do and the kids needed to return to school. Against my feelings to stay we did fly home on Thursday and had the kids back to school Friday.
Saturday evening April 11 about midnight my mom called us to say the nurse had called and my dad was not expected to survive the night. This was the worst night of my life, I felt both alone and in shock. Thankgoodness I have a great friend and neighbor Sheri who is also a night owl. I called her and she came right over and was here for me. Sheri took control when I did not realize I needed her to, she said I will take care of your boys and animals and you and Dan go to be with your mom. She was at our house until 1am and then back at 5am so we could catch the earliest flight. I had also called my Dad's sister who lives in Pennsylvania to arrange for her to fly down also. We all met up in Atlanta Easter sunday am and flew to Gainesville where my parents neighbor met us and drove us to the hospital.
Sitting watching my Dad that last day was one of the hardest things I have ever done. Thanks to Sheri and Karen for letting me vent and all of the supportive texts you both sent, they helped me through this difficult time. The hospital staff was terrible, once they found out he was terminal they did nothing for him. We had him moved to Hospice on Sunday afternoon so that he could be with caring people. Since my parents live an hour from the hospital we did not follow them to hospice, but instead said goodbye to my Dad and said we would see him the next day. We did not get that chance, the hospice staffed called at 9am Monday morning to tell us he had passed away. All 4 of us were in shock that he was gone, just 2 months earlier he was walking 2 miles a day and now he was gone.
My first thought was of Max and how would I tell him his Grandpa died. I contacted both Sheri and Karen (she is also Max's teacher) to let them know and that I would tell Max later after school. We all agreed but somehow Max already knew about his grandfather, I guess kids know more than we give them credit for.
I was very worried about Max because he seemed to brush it all off, although we did see a change in his grades at school. If he would see me getting upset Max would ask why are you crying, almost like he didnt think there was a reason to be sad.
We had a memorial service for my Dad this past Saturday June 6. The 4 of us, my mom, aunt and many friends of my parents were in attendance. The church was full which was very nice to see, both my boys were perfect gentlemen and we heard many comments on how well behaved they were. During the service Max wrote down some thoughts he had about his grandfather, he shared them with me afterwards. He wrote My Grandpa was a great man, he served our country in the army and retired from the post office, I miss him very much. I hugged him and told him that grandpa thought he was very special too and one of the last things my dad said was that Max was the best thing that ever happened to our family. Over the next few days Max did breakdown a few times, which I was glad to see since he had been holding everything in. We planted a special tree my parents yard and I told Max that he could talk to grandpa by the tree and he has.
Max is now spending a few weeks in Florida with my mom, he said he wants to help Grandma. I think they are helping each other through all this.
As the weeks go by life is getting a little easier, but there are still rough times but I know they will get better.